Dick Dastardly

Hi everyone!

I know it’s been a while since I have posted anything and I am sorry, but if you are like me, you barely noticed cause of all the other stuff that keeps your time consumed. Siooooooo…..

Here I am !

This time I want to speak bluntly about ~ Mr. Dick Dastardly ~ we shall call him.

I met this man on online dating, of course, and well, quite frankly it was going great. Just being pen pals at this time, we were getting along just fine. He texted me and emailed me regularly…..a bit more than the average man, but, not too much to exasperate me, I am sure you know the type…they blow up your phone and keep you thinking they must be needy, 10 texts a day from a person you barely know is ridiculous!

He was a “war re-enact or” and well, though that is peculiar in my circles, it’s ok with me. It’s a man who likes to play dress-up and has a dramatic flare ~ so far so good.

I went through a very hard family crisis and he was there for me, gentle, loving, giving me great advice and all a friend could ask for, seriously he was great.

Then suddenly – out of know where – on one night’s text, after previously talking about guns and tanks….here comes mister nasty!

He sends me a text ~ yep you got it ~ of Mr. pee pee. A full blown pic of his private parts, erect too.

And then comes 2 more…right after that! WOW!

Not that I mind men with large….hmmm.hmmmm….but seriously….on a text?

And to top it off, my good friend Mr. BMW answered the text for me while I was making cookies for a group I had over to my house. I wish you could have seen his face ~ priceless ~ mouth dropped open and a sort of disgusting scowl coming over his upper brow. I thought he would either laugh himself silly or throw up, the jury is still out.

SO: here is the lesson…..guys and gals…..don’t sex text your private anything to anyone!

#1. It’s just bad manners and nasty.

2. It makes you look like a sex crazed pervert, not dating material

3. Though women do care what kind of package you may be carrying, we do not want to see it until the appropriate time, preferably on our wedding night.

4. Just in case you did not know this, once on the internet, always on the internet.

5. This man, whom I backed up verbally and bluntly, is NOW mortified and embarrassed and has lost his chance with me, if he ever had one.

6. Women really are looking for their “Prince Charming” and no where in Disney’s fairytales does Prince Charming “flash” people with his private parts.

Here’s the moral of the story guys and gals….

If you someday want to use that private part in your pants ~ leave it in your pants until your partner wants to see it!

Mr. Dick Dastardly:

“You have been weighed~ you have been measured and you have been found wanting.”

A Knight’s Tale

goodnight:

the unknown date